7 Things Parents Say (You’ll Say Them, Too!) You will be surprised at what comes out of your mouth sometimes Before I became a parent, there were so many things I swore I’d never say to my child — many of which I’ve already uttered, even though my child just barely turned two. Below is my list of clichéd things parents say, coming soon to a home near you

1. “Mommy loves/wants/would like you to” etc. Ah, yes — speaking in the third person. It’s not just for Bob Dole anymore. 2. “See, that’s why I told you not to…” Because after-the-fact rationalizations are so effective with a toddler. 3. “Do you want apple juice, orange juice, or grape juice?” This one is a two-fer in that I always swore that a) I wouldn’t give my children oodles of choices about what to eat and drink, and b) I would largely keep them away from the intensive sugar delivery system that is a sippy cup full of juice.

4. “Do you want to pick up your toys now?” Shockingly, the only answer I ever get to this one is “no.” 5. “We don’t hit.” I guess I thought I’d get a perfectly behaved child for whom this admonition wouldn’t be necessary — or maybe that I’d just hypocritically smack her across the bottom if she smacked someone else. Not sure, really, but this statement is part of my repertoire now.